How Men Can Tell You They Are Happy

A person who is always happy can be fun to be with, and that is one thing that a man with good intentions will look for in a lady. Blessing ukemena writes.

How would your man know that you are happy? It's not very complicated, because every person who is mostly stable can tell if you are a happy person, not just by the way you laugh, but by certain pointers in your life. Men do like a woman who is of strong personality, in that she can hold her own any day, anywhere and still be happy. Here are some of the pointers men look out for:

At peace with friends:
A man can get bored with hearing tales of how you fought with your girlfriends today or last week; plus, they get the impression that you can't keep yourself together. If there is constant turmoil in a woman’s group of friends, you can be sure there is constant turmoil in the romantic relationships the woman carries on as well.

Fights only happen for these reasons: insecurity, pride, jealousy, ego and a need to be “right” attitude. When people can let go of those things, their friendships are typically much more peaceful. And those are all dynamics no man wants in his relationship.

She is optimistic:
This does not mean that she does not complain; all women do that, and you would be an obnoxiously, naive person if you don’t. But, with every complaint or stress, comes a glimmer of hope. A man notices the difference between, “Everything in my life sucks!” and “Everything in my life sucks! At the moment…But it will be okay. I’ll figure it out.”

He knows that a woman that ends her complaints with hope, is a woman that will move forward in her life,  and therein continue to be happy. The woman that just complains for the sake of complaining is usually a self-defeatist that blames the world for her problems, and doesn’t feel responsible for fixing them. Therein, such woman often looks to her man to fix them, which the man does not always want to do.

She’s committed to her interests:
She loves dancing, music, outreach programmes and improving herself each time, and so, she takes a class or meets with a group every week or once a month at least. She doesn’t cutback on these activities for a man. A man likes a woman that doesn’t compromise her own desires for him, because in the end, she doesn’t compromise her own identity for him.

Once a woman starts giving up her own hobbies, interests and passions, she can become too dependent on a man to define her. And that’s too large of a burden for a man to carry.

She forgives easily:
The truth is that anything anybody ever does to you, stems directly from their own fears, insecurities and issues. Hate is just the cowardly way to handle fear. If someone cheated on you, was rude to you, betrayed you…those were all the actions they did, as a way to avoid something they feared.

A truly confident woman knows this, and allows herself to forgive. She does not start needless arguments. She doesn’t start bar fights. She doesn’t slash the tires of a friend that stabbed her in the back. She humbly understands that nothing is personal and moves on with her life.

She has plans for her future:
She is not always waiting for the man to plan for her. She makes the plans, although she includes him. She’s not just “working for the man,” clocking in and clocking out, with no change in sight. She has moves mapped out. She has milestones she would like to reach, and plans to reach them.

A woman that never looks ahead in her career often becomes depressed, and looks to someone else to give her things to look forward to, or to give her an “escape.” A man doesn’t want to be your escape. He wants to be an addition to your already happy life.

She lets her feelings be known:
She doesn’t hesitate to let a man know when he has hurt her, or when he is being stubborn or irrational. She speaks up for herself, and is willing to do the work (via communication) to get what she needs. When a woman isn’t willing to speak up for herself, this says to a man that she is desperate for a boyfriend; so desperate, that she doesn’t want to stir up a fuss. And that is not attractive.

She doesn’t always need a man's praise:
She rarely asks, “Do you like me? Do you love me? Do I look good? Am I attractive? Do you think I’m funny?” Of course, a man should tell a woman occasionally that she is those things if he believes them.But if a woman asks too often, the man becomes constantly aware that she is seeking praise. He begins to feel that she is insecure and he feels an enormous responsibility to appease her insecurities.

She compliments others:
She goes out of her way to tell another woman she looks nice, or to tell a friend how intelligent they are, or a co-worker how well they did on a presentation. A complimentary person is a confident person, because they don’t fear that praising others takes attention away from themselves. They feel confident in their own strengths, and in the ways they shine. They don’t feel threatened by someone else that shines, too.

She has long-standing friendships:
Nothing provides the warmth and comfort of a friend you’ve had for years. A woman that has a life full of friends she still sees or speaks to from college, high school or childhood, is a happy woman. Men are wary of women that struggle to keep friends for more than a year or two. It indicates that in some way, that woman angers all of her friends, or is too easily upset, and men would rather avoid such women.

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